Hunter

 

I Haven't seen my grandson since Christmas 21. I texted him one day back when I 1st got to San Antonio and asked if he wanted to go camping. He was excited. I told him to go ask his parents. That was the last communication there. I saw him at Christmas 21. I was obviously blocked. I'll have a hard time and many years to forgive them for keeping him from me. 

I've accepted the notion that not any of my family like me. Pretty certain of that. I've moved on. I'll probably never see any of my siblings again. Maybe my sister if she comes looking for me. Personally, I wouldn't drive 10 miles to see any of them.

For the past 15 years, nobody seeks me out except my sister. I'd hear from kids maybe twice each year. Brothers? I have 3 older brothers and they want no part of me. So, I decided to just start a new life, new friends, healthier life. I am aware of my mental health and realize that my siblings are old and out of touch with mental disorders. So be it. My mom is gone so I don't have to pretend anymore. 

I get online and look for friends. Most are dead. Nobody has EVER looked for me so... okeedokee.

I have been ridiculed, lectured, laughed at by siblings. I'm done. Now I'm navigating using vibes from people. I'm no longer seeking people for friends, I'm searching for those in need in hopes I have something they need. I just want to be a service to my fellow man even though I don't trust anybody. Love. The Beatles said it best. All you need is love. Letting people know you love them is what they need most.